scatterbrain

four-leaf clover

2012-02-09T19:02:00.000-08:00

Been watching J-drama, Honey & Clover and I'm about to fall in love with clover. Some people believe that it brings good luck to their finders, perhaps like giving you such a big motivation that something good is going to be happen soon. According to legend, each leaf represents something: the first is for faith , the second is for hope , the third is for love and the fourth is for love (source: wiki). It's hontou kawai ,isn't ? I don't know whether that's true or not but the certain thing is it will make me uber happy if I could have one. I wish I could see that four-leaf clover, one day.

If I were

2012-02-02T22:02:00.000-08:00

If I were a plant, I'd be pine.

forever alone

2012-02-01T22:05:00.000-08:00

hello! I'm such a #foreveralone girl hohoho. I hate being alone, but I just...like.. can do nothing to break this loneliness #eaa (read: tak berdaya). 4 days of suffering is enough for me. That feeling when you just need somebody to say 'are you ok?' 'get well soon' especially when you were being locked in a room, you didnt know what to do hmm actually you were just too weak to do something, and completely bored. But thanks for who'd already cared about me.thanks. *zipmouth* Hahaha btw, I've done watching Ouran High School! Entertaining and uber Kawaiii! Kyouya Ootori, he's so Typically Pau! You have your name written in my heart. Hahaha! *kurangwaras*

catch the moon

2012-01-25T09:23:00.000-08:00

People. Somehow we're the same, we're causing people pain. Some stand to take the blame and some scramble to deny it. And some just run away, like nothing happened. Disguise in their gloomy coat and walk away on the windy day. They actually don't know what on earth is happening, they're just too busy wandering around on their little galaxy. Fearless or perhaps it's called 'unconscious'. They thought they're invisible, a bit naive. They're just nobody who have no reason being seen, unwanted, they thought. But 'thought' could be wrong.

But she is just a girl. She doesn't know about destiny but she's on her way to find what she is supposed to do in this quirky space. Seeking for the castle inside the black forest, for the truth behind the lies though she doesn't know what truth is. But she loves that atmosphere, when the scent of pines blows into her lung, perhaps it's called 'peace'. She'd better run before it's going to be dark. Take the fishing tackle, choose the best cup, and let the wind show her the way. It feels like she's gonna catch the moon. No one could stop her.

fl❀wers

2012-01-20T21:50:00.000-08:00

" Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day, including them❀ "
xx

I'll see you soon

2012-01-19T20:18:00.000-08:00

Holiday has already started. Do I feel happy? of course, more quality times with pillows hihi. But somehow, I feel hmm bored-to-death and I hate it when I get nothing to do or even nothing to think. Sitting pretty ya ya ya and let us wait until d-min 2nd semester, I'd be so friggin asdgtsakf because holiday it's gonna be over. Nyah! so let's just do what you wanna do , Pau! I'll see you soon, mr/mrs. cadaver *whups*. I hope it's gonna be another great semester. There're so many things I should upgrade according to what I've learned from my first semester gyaaa. It's going to be uber cool, amen! I've read this " It's not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change. Try not to be a man of success but a man of value "

You can pass medical school with just luck, but to be a good doctor, you need knowledge, attitude, and humanity - tumblr.

it's coming

2012-01-13T07:49:00.000-08:00

Thank God. First semester was great, I know You're the best. Finally, the one I've been waiting for is coming, holiday! Enjoy me and love you more, pillow & bolster. Boom! x

I wonder how it feels

2012-01-05T03:03:00.000-08:00

I just can't imagine how they could stand being trapped in those small rooms. While the others are having fun, hanging out, having vacation and they're just waiting for another cars to come, like in the middle of nowhere. Salute. They're great. Being a doctor or lawyer is what most of people want to be and dreams of most teenager in the world. I definitely know they're cool ,dazzling, especially helping those who's suffering. But, have you ever thought how it feels being a 'toll officer'. Is there anyone has a dream to be one of them? Me not. I'm sure I cant stand doing that, somehow doing nothing & having nothing to be reached make me desperately frustrated. They're doing behind the scenes, not seen or even their existence is often forgotten, but they're few tough creatures who sacrificed for our sake. I love doing behind the scenes and I'm sure I adore them. Once again, I feel blessed. Thank you. Semangat !

sisterhood

2011-12-26T09:58:00.000-08:00

a : ngomong-ngomong, aku ini jadi adik kok ya ngeselin banget ya
b : iya banget
a : yaampuuun sabar banget ya punya adik macam saya
b : kasihan juga sih
a : tapi mau gimana lagi
b : ya apa gimana?
a : pada dasarnya aku emang ngeselin, banget.
b : haha, ga tau diri. Apatis!

*a and b, they're having conversation inside my mind"

a little

2011-12-23T04:45:00.000-08:00

hey! A little from my new schoolifee ! Blah dunno what to write. That's it. Anyway, itu foto yang kebetulan ada di folder di tengah-tengah himpitan ppt biomed err. Wish me luck for the first UAS! Keep calm and be strong Pau!

2 sleeps until Christmas

2011-12-23T04:14:00.001-08:00

2 sleeps until Christmas. Indescribable feeling. Gyaaaa !

Happy Thing

2011-12-21T10:52:00.000-08:00

High School reunion #HappyThing. Been a long time, feel so blessed I could say hello to them especially dessy and dita. Today was great, I saw dessy running kyaa! somehow made me happy happy . Burst of dopamine :) get well soon des! hope for the best for you. Love ya #srigala !

odd

2011-12-16T11:19:00.001-08:00

In the middle of super boring biomed-browsing which keywords are so much (not) interesting, Idk why, I open some blog accounts. They have the same age with me and they're still highschoolers. Reading their stories hmm it's like reading such as teenager novel. It seems that we're live in different world haha belong to my last two years. Aduh, rasanya aneh, odd. Wondering how it feels being like them, having those periods of life. Hahaha. Okay, back to biomed. Bye!

lethargy

2011-12-15T10:23:00.000-08:00

When you try your best but you don't succeed and the tears come streaming down your face..

Perhaps it's me who feel so tired-to-death. Lack of energy, lethargy. And the last I can do is...just being an apathetic. don't judge me that it's wrong, run away is so much better for me, at least for now.

I'll meet you there

2011-12-14T04:01:00.000-08:00

hello, I'll meet you there. Metro skies with country air. One day, I'll say "Hisashiburi"

dazzling 17

2011-12-09T08:46:00.000-08:00

sweet!

mbak cap & mbak bibo

my 1st earl grey

Yesterday which was several hours ago, 9-12. It was the date I born seventeen years ago. Talk about seventeen, people tend to think that seventeen is a special phase in every one's life. Actually, I'm not that kind of person who's excited of celebrating new age . Making party and being the sweetest princess for one night, not my typical . I was immature and now? I'm being the mature one, haha successfully doubtful. getting older doesn't always mean that people grow up. Our outside may grow but our inside? it's not a simple matter, especially for my own self. Nowadays, I started thinking about many things and most of them...unpredictably random, hm I guess you cant even imagine it haha. Kinda futurism and curious. Since I met new people, new perspective, new fears, and new atmosphere here, all of that 'new' started to bother my mind. Thunderstorm inside. When I tried to understand and follow the 'new', I met so many obstacles. And sometimes, I felt lost and trapped in the middle of labyrinth puzzling me like I'll never find the exit gate. But, just like the fireworks saving the one who's lost in the labyrinth, 'these' people of 'those' people really help me, though they might be not understand what I see in their glances. But truly, 'these' people do have important role in my new adventure. begitulaaah, that's what I thought and felt recently, struggling in this freaking unpredictable life.

But yesterday, perhaps it's me naturally refused all of gloominess, I feel like a cute teenager eating halupanda under the purple-blue sky *random me*. Otanjoubi omedetou gozaimasu Pau! Started from around 00.12, my hormonal system produced a burst of dopamine, too much haha. That was so breathtaking. Then, I went to my college as usual, and zing!gyaa!kyaa! Thank you tewmanws-tewmanws giving me all of the best wishes. That's it, what I love in every birthday is there're so many prayers hahaha. Thank you for the sweet and cool gifts, dear srigalaaa. Happy happy happy. And the special one was those mysterious letters I got from my friends at college. From the morning class until the super-tiring yudisium, I got 15 letters. Zing! Saya tidak menyangka. They sang a birthday song and brought a cute cake, slurp hot flush! actually I got nervous haha, honestly I'm not good at controlling my emotion . I was so frigging happy but when it altered from happy to too much happy, somehow I couldn't hold my tears, it was tears of happiness. Kyaa saya senang sekali membaca tiap kata yang ada di setiap kertas, hiks, malu, terharu, dan bahagia. Tengkiyuuu mbak bibo, mbak capila for making those wonderfullll letters and surprises :* *emotekitikkitik* .Thanks for everyone, I cant mention it one by one. Arigatou onisaan. Merci beaucoup mom dad bro sist. Terimakasih Tuhan :) Thank you for all the wishes, surprises, hugs, gifts, loves! for the dazzling Friday. I feel like don't wanna end that Friday, seriously. lots of love!

By the way, finally I had a cup of tea , it was Earl Grey ! fufufu

halu

2011-12-07T06:15:00.000-08:00

Haluuuu everyone! Today, after the super boring class, I went to one of malls in Surabaya with 3 mbak-mbak. Mbak bibo, mbak capila, and mbak nanda. We ate ice cream, had a lunch, and took some pictures. futuuwww bux. hahaha kinda fun and I feel like a cute teenager hahaha. By the way, Choco chips with Choco mint are such a perfect match, to die for! Whoaa bad news, the final exams are coming, help !

Peacetime

2011-11-27T05:51:00.000-08:00

Feeling the comfort of eyes is your sole intention
We all want to be understood unconditionally
But you have to realize that a viewer needs distance
And the moment your wall melts down - the inside is outside

Maybe way back in the past when people were different,
shortening bonds made them last
Now we emphasize our difference
We have been enrolled one by one for the Peacetime Resistance,
and we're fighting our battles alone

We've got four eyes , so why yearn for one perspective?
We've got colours with shades erased when blended
We've got four eyes , so why yearn for one perspective?
We've got colours, but they disappear when blended

Peacetime Resistance - KOC

By the way, peacetime for me is bedtime. I need more sleep.

2011-11-25T07:04:00.000-08:00

a senior said,

How about you Pau? Learn more Pau.

Me gusta

2011-11-17T05:24:00.000-08:00

source - mbak bib's

Kata mbak capila, raut wajah ku kadang terlihat seperti Me gusta. Intimidating. Haha!
Saya sedang belajar untuk belajar lebih baik.

something

2011-10-28T13:09:00.000-07:00

Since the first, I wanna be 'something'. I am optimistic and ambitious. But, it seems a lot of things needs re-thinking. I think my parameters of 'something' has changed, or upgraded. It's really 'something'. Dad, light my way.

fovea

2011-10-15T16:45:00.000-07:00

Fovea: In the eye, a tiny pit located in the macula of the retina that provides the clearest vision of all. Only in the fovea are the layers of the retina spread aside to let light fall directly on the cones, the cells that give the sharpest image. Also called the central fovea or fovea centralis. My very first bulletin, Fovea which is actually an assignment I got from Lingua. Enthusiasm. Galauing time which made me happy. Behind the scene was awesome, mbak bibo's NYC hahaha. Well done! Best group and best lay outer. Bunch of thanks to Foveist, we rock guys! This is just the beginning, goodluck me goodluck the other new linguists. It's goin to be amazing.

sweet

2011-10-15T16:09:00.000-07:00

" Do not look at the bad side of a problem, try to look at the other side. The good one where you can find the sweetest reason why there must be a problem. Then, you'll feel like an ice cream all day long "

Still learning, still trying. God bless me and you.

hectic

2011-10-09T00:08:00.000-07:00

I wish I could wind down for a while and escape from this rush. I do need my personal time, it's been a loooong time not doing those unyu things and ya it makes my mood swings easier. Perhaps I just need time adjusting this new world. Fenomena Kegalauan Maba, this is the perfect way to describe what's goin on in my world now. Deadline deadline, they're killing me. Biomed biomed, I wish I could love you more and more. I wish, hm nope! I will. And as usual my best enemy ever, time, you're such my mood killer, looking at my to do list *gasp* I know I'll play "Me vs Zombie" again. Ciao!

Birthday girl

2011-10-07T16:01:00.001-07:00

Hello! Long time no see, I've been so busy these weeks. Hm too bizzi I cant explain. Zing! Wish I could wind down for a while forgetting this rush and just laying down on my bed. Wish I could adjust with this so unpredictable atmosphere soon, amen.
Anyway I met new frienddsss, and one of them named Dea. Two days ago was her birthday, kinda cute :3 Look at her, I just cant understand why some of my friends call me Dea and call Dea with my name, bzz hahaha. Happy sweet 18 Dea Volensia, best wishes . Lay sisterz!

hey!

2011-09-13T08:33:00.000-07:00

[ No offense ]

MUD

2011-09-12T08:14:00.000-07:00

MUD. Moody. Ugly. Dumb. MUD, it's so me hahaha

backyard

2011-08-30T19:48:00.000-07:00

Amateur and keep learning. Those are taken when I went to City of Apple, last week. Walking around the street with scent of pines around, peacefulness. Listening to Erlend & Eirik while looking out the window, feel so green. Thank God :)

Happy Eid Mubarak 1432 H to all Muslims around the world :)

p.s : I do really need the new black one, it's already broken. for the second times, what a pity !

Short trip

2011-08-12T22:46:00.001-07:00

Jakarta Bandung - Short trip with Mom and Sister

Holiday is gonna be over tomorrow, Goodbye ! Wish me luck folks, Faculty of Medicine 2011 here I go :D

Melloow Swallow

2011-08-12T17:32:00.000-07:00

Good morning, universe. Let's start this Saturday with a big smile :)
Suddenly, I miss blogging though few days ago I've posted somethin here hahaha dunno I just feel so random this morning. Last night, I couldn't sleep as usual and I tried to kill the time, hmm I hate doing nothing, then turned on laptop and re-watched one of my fave movies, The nightmare before Christmas. Oh em ji, I heart this movie, Tim Burton done such a perfect work! Jack the king of Pumpkin with his skeleton, kawaaiii! In the middle of the night, wearing a headphone, trying to listen the conversations(improve my listening skill eaaa), then singing all the songs. Trust me, the soundtrack is so damn cool. Then, the end. Thinkin what should I do then, but Thank God! He's surely my salvation. I knew it was His plan to let me buy those teenage-things-called-romannovel that night. So I opened the plastic and read that book, hmm whatever what would happen after reading that book, meloow galau I didn't care at all blaah. Page 19. Bored. DANG! Dunno or perhaps it's God's plan, suddenly I saw something besides my sister's pillow, it was Poconggg's book. I never thought I wanna buy that one, never ever haha, but there was a book in front of me, so just feel free to read hahaha. Skip. Skip. Skip. Hey do I need to tell you about the story of Poconggg here? Hell o ! Sure, kinda weird but made me laughin hahaha and somehow in that case(no mention) I feel the same way like what you feel Conggg *slap* But one thing I'm pretty sure is you're not scary at all , you're such a failed ghost Conggg hahaha. Shortly, I felt dizzy and zzzzzz and you know lah #grammarless .

But that wasn't the point, actually the reason why I wanna post is THIS. It was my dream last night, and Thank God it wasn't a nightmare anymore(lately I always had nightmares,poor me) Yipi! Such a melancholy dream but not that mellooww swaloow (?). And the story begins..there are three humans standing there, two males and one female. They are bestfriend till the end forever ever ever *too dramatic. They've known each other since child, play and study together, share their thoughts and problems together. Kinda sweet. They grow up together just like siblings and perhaps this called born to be together. Until they reach the period in which people cant understand what their liver(?) means and seems like your brain cant handle this blaah thing, yah you know lah. Then, it turns into complicated story when one of them,male, hmm just call him "Aang". Aang cant forgive himself because he falls in love with his own best friend, the female and call her "Katara". Katara has been like their little sister, Aang and hmm let's call him "Saka" have you ever hear those names (Waiiitt! Aang, Saka, Katara hahaha fine!just ignore it LOL) always protect her such her private bodyguard. But Aang doesn't have enough courage to tell Katara what he really feels, he just doesn't wanna break this perfect bestfriendship they've built since child. He know it will become so awkward if he do that, so with hard effort, Aang forces himself pretending like there's no blaaah. And as you know, it's pretty hurt being like that hiks *no hope. Day by day, finally for the very first time Katara has a boyfriend. Aang and Saka are so surprised to hear that, especially for Aang. Heartbreak, broken, failed, it all ends here Voldemort! you die! haha -_- Then, things change. They're not that bestfriend forever never end again, Katara seems so busy with her new bf , Aang feels so dump and becomes the silence one, and Saka? he doesn't understand what's goin on, dunno what to do. But they still hang out together sometimes even though not that often. Aang such a fool being a stalker and jealously watch Katara and her bf do. And what make it worse is Aang cant handle himself mumbling and complaining to Katara, such a protective mother zz.

Shortly, it all gettin on Katara's nerves, she doesn't feel comfortable around Aang anymore. Then, she talks to Saka about this. Again . Again then again. And it becomes often. She's gettin closer to him and gettin farther to Aang. And DANG! her boyfriend who seems so perfect to her, break her heart for the very first time, poor Katara. Cry cry,and the one who beside her is Saka. Skippp. Katara is just a human, humans are ababil especially teenager (anw, what's ababil in english?lol) And coool! now, she admit that she has just fallen in love with her bestfriend, Saka. HAHA Drama! What about Saka? He dunno what to do as usual. Skiipp. Aang knows what's goin on between Saka and Katara then totally become frustated. Friendship becomes Hatership. Climacs. Saka and Aang become enemies, Aang cant forgive Saka because he cant treat Katara like he wanna treat her and why it should be him not me. Saka cant forgive Aang because hmm I dunno haha. Skip again. Finally, Katara realize what the matter is, stupid girl -_- She get stressed and because she is kinda ababil and I must admit this story is such a meloow drama, she screaaams and criees out loud. Idk how suddenly there humans are standing there, the place where this story began. There are trees, I guess they must be in the forest haha Drama! Katara's standing at the edge of cliff and cry out loud again beeeh -_- Aang and Saka look at each other, feel so terrible sad. So much regrets. And their mind keep calling their past memories, bittersweet symphony. DANG! Imagine those K-drama scenes when the girl cant think clearly with healty brain, the girl wanna jump out from the cliff, Katara . But Aang and Saka stop her, and hold her hands together. Then they cry and laugh together. Big Hug. Finally, they're still that bestfriend together forever never end. The end. Wake up!
Hahahaha kinda sweet story, isnt it? Okay, Im gonna continue reading that novel I've mentioned before with a cup of tea. Let's get ready to meloow swaloow hahhaha. Thank you, have an ahmazing Saturday, Ciao!

p.s : sorry for my grammarless hahaha. peace and gaul !
anw, kalo dipikir-pikir buat apa gue ceritiin mimpi tadi, penting banget deh hahaha, sudahlah gue tau ini semua ulahnya si Poconggg, semua salah dia!

plain

2011-08-11T20:26:00.000-07:00

I made this last month, no reason. Plain girl, wish I could be that girl somehow. It's so much easier to feel plain than pain . But deep down, pain is better bringing us to the next step of our life than plain stucking us in our safe place, no progress, emptiness. Live your life folks. Wish me luck for the next busy week. Ganbatte! Genki desu ne :)

By the way, I've read THIS quote somewhere, cekidot.

" This is what I'm scared after all this time to get attached to someone. That someone will eventually leave. "

speechless. sigh.

Believe

2011-08-08T22:44:00.000-07:00

I do believe wishes really come true because I have The one I could believe in, my beloved Father . For all He gave to me, thank you. I know what I have now isn't reached with my own effort, it's all Him. I wouldn't be very happy that day when I got accepted in university if I didn't believe in him. I'm not one of Medicine Faculty's students now if I don't believe in him. The one who I can rely on, in this rough life, The one who never leave me, in this terrible world, and for sure The one who always love me purely. But me, I always hurt Him again and again. Somehow I couldn't let myself calm and keep worrying things too far like I've never read Your promises , sometimes I act like I'm the only one who has the most terrible problem while so many people out there even don't have anything to eat. I complain too much like a fool forgetting what You've given me. Sorry. But deep down inside, I don't wanna be that one, I wanna be a good person, better person. I do regret, sorry for hurting You over and over. I wanna learn more ,please make me wiser my Guide. I only trust You. I love you most. What thing is certain in this world? Your love , for sure. Thank God :)

mysterious

2011-08-02T20:56:00.000-07:00

Have you ever had a secret admirer? or perhaps you're the one hahaha. I wonder to know how's your feeling if you get a packet from someone who you don't know. Kinda awkward. One day, suddenly there's a pink box comes to your house from a mailman. Then your mom and dad feel so curious what is that. Feeling like eer maybe this is a jackpot, or maybe a bomb huh. Weird and a lil bit scare you. And what makes it weirder is when your name is written as a recipient of the packet. Then you open it. Boooooom! is it a terror bomb? Nope. That's a pink tedy. Krik how's your feeling? shocked. Wait, then you see a white envelope and there's kind of greeting card on it. I bet you must be curious and want to read that. ' just to say hello..,and tell you, I'm thinking of you ' . Silence. Whaaat ? then you read who is the sender, and the name is such a disguised name. Totally weird, you don't have any idea who is that. Finally, how's your feeling? like a character in the drama? what a teenage dream. Hmm for me, it's a bit like horror movie. Honestly, I'd be happier to get some questions on my formspring from anonymously but perhaps i still have clue to guess who they are than being scared with melancholy and mysterious box. But thank you I feel so pleased that I have a secret admirer , it's such a long time just being a secret admirer, and ya I know how it feels. Thanks a lot it makes me learn that I still have someone who likes me and God who love me, feel so blessed and have to be more grateful. Merci.

Somebody

2011-08-02T01:11:00.000-07:00

I want somebody to share. share my life. share my innermost thoughts. know my intimate details. someone who'll stand by my side. and give me support. and in return he'll get my support. he will listen to me when I want to speak. about the world we live in and life in general. though my views may be wrong. they may even be perverted. he'll hear me out and won't easily be converted to my way of thinking. in fact he'll often disagree but at the end of it all. he will understand me. I want somebody who cares for me passionately. with every thought and with every breath. someone who'll help me see things in a different light. I like somebody not because he has superiorities but because it's who you are. Hmmm daydreaming while listening to Scala's song. I think I'm in love with Scala. Bonne chance kk. kyaaaa hahaha

summer girl

2011-07-27T21:49:00.000-07:00

I'm a summer girl in the summer world. Life in summer, it's fantastic haha. Huaah I wish I could go to the beach now! I want a vacation, I need fresh air as soon as possible. Oh my God, this atmosphere is killing me, doing nothing, siting pretty. I do hate it gzzz really make me dizzy. Somebody take me out of here! It's so HOT here, hey you why so hot?

Ah!mazing

2011-07-20T09:19:00.000-07:00

June 14th ,2011

Thank you srigala for all, for these two years. Ah!mazing

girls day out

2011-07-20T08:19:00.000-07:00

Two days ago, I went out. It's been a long time. Girls day out with my sister and her friends, it was fun. Spending too much time at home really made me goin' crazy. Sitting pretty. I don't even know what to do, I've watched so many korean dramas until I lost my interest on it haha, I've read some books,comics,etc until my eyes couldn't stand reading it. Boring huh? But the most annoying one is when suddenly the unexpected things across my mind and make me 'galau'. No hope. I really want the real holiday, seriously. Blaaaahhh

Irreplaceable

2011-07-15T08:30:00.000-07:00

I really wanna be a doctor helping people around me but on the other side I still wanna be someone I've dreamed. I can't ignore the monster inside yelling to catch my attention "hey, I'm the one you're interested in, the one you've craved for so long, the one you've loved since child". I know. I really understand what I really like but I know what I really wanna do. Yet, it doesn't mean I've forgot you, doesn't mean I'll leave you behind. You're right beside me and still the same, irreplaceable.

reality

2011-06-20T09:23:00.000-07:00

" Today was a fairytale. Yet, today isn't a fairytale "

Jitsuni o kinodoku ˘̩̩̩~˘̩̩̩

headline news

2011-06-14T19:47:00.000-07:00

Ohayoo, June 15th. Hari ini ulang tahun teman baik saya, tobil, Happy birthday kakak! Hari ini seharusnya aku bangun dengan hati gembira karena banyak alasan yang memang menggembirakan. Kemarin srigala habis jalan-jalan dari Batu, asik pol main-main terus, melupakan kepenatan sejenak dan hari-hari yang suram terjebak di rumah dengan tingkat stres yang tinggi. Sayang sekali, ada srigala yang enggak bisa ikut fyufyu tapi tetep aja seru haha. Semuanya bagaikan pelangi yang warnanya unyu sampai sebuah berita yang menyesakkan datang. Ternyata laptop gue hilang haha haha haha. Begitu sampai di rumah, perasaanku jadi aneh antara sedih capek marah dan bodoh. Rasanya aneh baru aja tadi ketawa-ketawa bahagia eh sekarang? Laptop pertama gue, yang beli mama gue, isinya data-data berharga gue, diambil sama orang #emosi . Tapi udah terlanjur, yaudah , lain kali harus lebih hati-hati ya cemans. Dunia ini labil kadang bisa begitu indah dan sedetik kemudian bisa suram sekali. Liburan kali ini menyenangkan sekaligus memukul fisik dan jiwa saya. Sekian headline news dari saya , terimakasih.

Metamorphosis

2011-06-03T01:09:00.000-07:00

Danielo Moralezo

My little brother is growing up. I'm getting older. The world spins, times can't be deceived. From a little nosy boy who likes playing silly games to a super lazy boy who gives a damn what t-shirt or shoes should he wears. Perhaps, that's what we called 'metamorphosis'
How are you? a simple question but difficult to answer. I don't know how to express this kind of feeling. Chaos. Lord, please save me. Amen.

rain

2011-05-15T21:18:00.000-07:00

Winter and spring, summer and fall. You're a windsurfer crossing the ocean, I'm the boat behind. Skiffle and rag, shuffle and waltz. You're the up-tip-toe ballerina, I'm the chorus line.
River and sea, picking up salt. Through the air as a fluffy cloud falling down as rain, But oh-oh-oh, I could never belong to you. Dear rain, would you help me effacer ce sentier ? I'm not strong enough.

Finally, au revoir Senior High School ! Don't forget all the good times we shared, bonne chance everyone !

(nowplaying : Boat behind)

thank you

2011-05-08T07:53:00.000-07:00

Thank you.

bean brain

2011-05-02T10:59:00.000-07:00

Women fear what men forget, men fear what women remember -@BoyFacts

-__________________________________-

She doesn't wanna be the one who left behind. She doesn't wanna leave either. She just can't movin on. She wont change a thing. She would rather wait than give up. She is such a bean brain.

currently listening : kiss the pain away -hollywood nobody

baka

2011-04-26T19:33:00.000-07:00

(another random drawing)

a : hey, what's wrong with you?
b : err, nothing. I just feel so baka.
a : I dont understand. c'est quoi?
b : hah forget it . Bakabakashii hodo kimi ga suki da !

p.s : baka means stupid. Bonjour, merci !

ohayou

2011-04-23T19:43:00.000-07:00

Ohayou! it has been three days since my loooong holiday. Finally, holiday has come, I don't have to go to school again and it means no homework yey! Am I happy? frankly not. I'll miss #srigala. And these days've made me so stressful, so many things I wanna do but my mind is being so strict and force me to do something which I don't really wanna do. Two days ago, I escaped(hah) from my house and had a date with my mom. We had a really good time, and it made a big stone stuckin' in my head a bit lighter haha. And one of the best things I've got is Kings of Convenience's fourth album, declaration of dependence. I always love their songs, sounds so peaceful. Erlend and Eirlik, they are genius ! Anyway, Happy Easter. God bless us !
( currently listening : misread -koc )
The loneliest people were the ones who always spoke the truth. The ones who made a difference by withstanding the indifference. I guess it's up to me now,should I take that risk or just smile? #singing

I wanna

2011-04-21T00:39:00.000-07:00

Fiuh. I've done my own best. Say goodbye to National exams. And say hello to seleksi nasional masuk perguruan tinggi negeri. I wanna make it. Please. And now, I wanna be a zombie ! Dangerous and strong. I don't care about blablah. I just wanna be more selfish this time. I wanna be one of those blue or yellow. I wanna make them smile. Fyu I'm perfectly random now, I wanna sit,eat cookies,listen to my favorite songs,and breath deeply in the cable car, alone #daydreaming

Ah !

2011-04-02T06:06:00.000-07:00

Seriously, what's wrong with my school or me hah? kenapa suka sekali mempersulit murid yang sudah sangat kesusahan ini(ups). Hell! I know that most people said,'smala is one of the best schools' ,but this is so freakin annoying.Su sah su sah ja di orang sok pin ter (?)

stres akibat ujian sekolah (terutama fisika) yang unpredictable >>
josep : kalo kayak gini lho, nilai kita bisa kalah sama sekolah(sensor) yang anaknya krik krik.
paul : iya ya -_-

#ketawagaring Thanksaloooot buat yang bilang karbitan tidak sebagus mutunya dengan buah yang matang asli(bahasanya lho ups) -_- I really don't care :p . Apa salahnya jadi karbitan ,kan buahnya sama aja halal boleh dimakan :D Waktu ujian praktek olahraga, "eh kutu buku bisa lari ternyata", duh makasi banget pujiannya, anw jadi kutu buku itu enggak jelek kok , malah banyak manfaatnya :D Tergantung usaha dan niat, buktinya dari dulu jaman sd smp gue! enggak bisa lari, dari 22menitan lari kompleks tiga kali, gue! bisa akselerasi(ehm) jadi 15menitan hahahaha -_- Dan akhirnya pun pelajaran olahraga ditutup dengan indah, and a bit proud soalnya kutu buku juga bisa lari #ngakak ! dari tiga kelas, qonita urutan kedua, ratih ketiga, aku keempat, dan disusul dengan srigala lainnya (bukan sombong tapi apa ya hahaa?). Dan saya mulai bosan dengan buku-buku unas, yang semakin hari namanya jadi makin aneh and a bit creepy hah, detik-detik belajar habis-habisan fyufyu. Habis ini unas, terus krik krik senam (baca:snmptn) dan saya sudah tidak sabar ingin menemani TempatPembuanganAkhir(?) 1700 1001 505 dan kawan-kawannya yang imut-imut -_-

oya, I really love this quote which I got from one of #srigala, Joseph Leonardo M H. here it is

"Jangan biarkan hidupmu terus mengalir seperti air karena air tidak mengalir ke atas"

after bahasa's practical examination

p.s : maaf sedikit frontal, maklum namanya juga PMS (?)

old

2011-03-28T20:59:00.000-07:00

Whooa I found this drawing when I was searching for my school's journal. I made it when I was in elementary school, 4th grade perhaps. Silly. Hahahaha is it look so old? I remember how happy I spent my time with drawing, almost everyday, at school, home, whenever. And the best thing was I didn't have to think about how much time I waste. But now, it's so different, time seems like my worst enemy -_-_-_-

a boy after the night train

2011-03-28T09:35:00.000-07:00

It suddenly appeared and unexpectedly became so faint .When the dark mist covered me, it suddenly came and gave a ray of light. Everything became so colorful and no one could imagine how pleased I was. But time flies too fast until the unexpected atmosphere comes out. Stuck. Or should I say 'setback' ? Now, we are walking on the different tracks, heading to the different space and time. It seems you're the good one and I'm such the most unlucky girl ever. I just can't move on and be such a donkey, stupid and weak, wondering if you're not leaving this story. And I keep reading these notes which every single words tells about the old time . This thunderstorm is killing me and now I wish I had a time machine. I wish I were on the train that night and the next morning...

(taken from A Boy After the Night Train)

Akiramenaide Japan !

2011-03-15T15:23:00.000-07:00

Even though I'm not a Japanese(yea I'm proud to be Indonesian), I feel so terribly sad because of the disaster happened in Japan last week. Seriously, I just couldn't believe when I read the news on newspaper about the tsunami and earthquake there. Nobody knows what will happen next, and ya people there didn't expect that the huge disaster would come. It just happen so sudden and fast. There were so many victims passed away and lost (and also Indonesians who live there ohmyGod). The atmosphere has already changed, the cities become such uninhabited, no activity ,no crowd at the corner of the cities. And now a big problem comes out, Fukushima Nuclear Power Plant. After a devastating 8.9 earthquake off the coast of Japan, a few nuclear power plants sustained damage and were having trouble with their cooling systems. The Fukushima Nuclear Power Plant experienced an explosion that has been blamed on a failed pumping system. I can't imagine how it feels to be one of those people, I'm sure they are really frustrated and scared. I do really hope that there would be no explosion anymore and please it's not the next Chernobyl crime :(

NIPPON I still love you. I still wanna go there ,playing with koinobori on the Children's day,wearing kimono on the Hanami festival, and walking around at Shibuya crossing. I still heart Jpop and singing these romaji lyrics, still wanna be an otaku, still wanna learn about samurai, and bla bla too much to tell. I know it's so easy izzzi picci bizzi to say "let's pray for Japan" or post on your facebook or twitter that you care about the disaster. But honestly do you really do the praying? Please universe, really do the praying. Get well soon, Japan :)

And this is one of my favorite songs, original soundtrack of 5 centimeters per second, sung by Yamazaki Masayoshi "One more time,one more chance". There's still a chance for Japan, please be strong and don't give up . Akiramenaide ! Tsuyoku naru!

Misu ミス

2011-02-24T08:19:00.000-08:00

私はあなたがいなくて寂しい

"Watashi wa anata ga inakute sabishii"

Long time no see, I hope you'll be alright there. I miss you, see ya!

(un)ready

2011-02-16T09:09:00.000-08:00

It's getting closer, the end is so near and the new beginning is waiting there. Am I ready? Nope, I'm not ready to lose them(ups) . I still wanna wear my grey skirt, still wanna sleep during the class, still wanna laugh with them. I wanna scream out loud in my school's corridor ,"aaaaaa". Huh, and something awful is waiting for us, even though we don't have much time like others. But I tell you, " We are young and dangerous !"(hahaha). So, are you ready? I must be ! Smala | AxiLima | Srigala yes we can, GO!

them

2011-02-02T16:51:00.000-08:00

Dont know why, lately I like to post about my class, srigala. I like to open my old journal when I was still in the first year. I like to see our photos(again and again), watch our videos, read our silly letters. I like to think about days I passed with them, remember our sweet,silly,annoying memories. I like to make some drawings and doodles about them. I like to write something about them, to remind me someday that I've met these awesome people. To remind me how amazing we are. I don't really wanna end it. Two years isn't enough for me :(

ohmysrigala

2011-01-29T01:25:00.000-08:00

Too much to tell.
"srigala" "seneng rekasa satus kurangi lima" "srigala" "auuuuu"

hand

2011-01-24T22:00:00.000-08:00

From hand to hand, from one person to another.

Special thanks for Jesus Christ, He hold my my hands through these days, I wish He would hold me until the end of this battle. Nothing is impossible for believers. Waking up in the morning and found her beside me, it was so wonderful, rarely happened, God bless you. Merci.

bizzi

2011-01-20T05:03:00.000-08:00

Bonsoir fellas ! Long time no post haha, I've been very busy bizzzzziiii these days and still having my examsss. I think it better than the last exam, I wish. Math,Physics,Biology have already done, not bad, but there is still a big problem , Chemistry, and next week I have to face it whether I'm ready or not. One thing I learned from these days, relax is an important factor that affect your performance in exams. By the way, that picture was made when I was trying to solve some physics problems and couldn't solve(absolutely!) the problem, get bored and tried to entertain myself. I believe. Trust the Lord, do your best , God care the rest !

yummy

2010-12-29T09:52:00.000-08:00

In the middle of the night, I feel so hungry---always(almost)---alone, awake, dunno what to do, freakin' hungry(hell-o I'm starving!) and dunno what to eat. So, I do some research(?) what's my fave food? to waste my time, hm I'll absolutely say Thai food. Then, is there anything else? ya ya actually, there are so many foooods that i like !
Cause I have nothing to do(nothing to eat),I make some drawings about my fave foods. Look so yummy! all of them! slurrp(drooling).Okay, let's enjooooooooy !

What do you think? Yummy ?

p.s : I don't like plagiarism.thankyou.

go green

2010-12-29T01:32:00.000-08:00

"Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not."

p.s : hey folks, you should try it , save energy in your website .

2010memories

2010-12-28T16:53:00.000-08:00

I have a lot of #2010memories with my family, friends, enemies(lol), #srigala, AFSer, etc. Although 2010 is a year that is not good enough for me, too many mistakes and problems, but I've got a lot of experience which were all ah-mazing ! I've learned so many things and I've failed so many things too haha. I'll miss you guys. 2011 , wish me luck. Be a better one :) Actually, I'm not ready for 2011 ! Ohmy ! but I have to face it. Ganbatte ! wish you all have a great new year eve !
anyway, follow my twitter account @pauloblivion .thanks.

._.

2010-12-27T20:05:00.000-08:00

Listening to the rain melody, inhaling the rain perfume, looking out the window, and sipping my tea. >> Hollywood Nobody >> Kings of Convenience >> ost.Nodame Cantabile :)
and then #krik >> Just the way you are -bruno mars- haha great song? hmm I don't think so. The first time I heard this song "sweet", then the second time "hmm nice" ,and after I heard it for several times "ohmyGod! stop it!". A bit(lot) disgusting,dunno why haha. Is there anybody has the same thought like me? Raise your hand !

someday

2010-12-26T03:46:00.000-08:00

I'm a non-stop dreamer ! whooa and wondering if I could go to some places someday, ya someday, someday I'll go there, take pictures, eat a lot of cuisines, buy some weird souvenirs, and many more more more more and more*screaming* Where ?

Japan
Japan has stolen half of my heart ! LOL ! seriously. I love anime,comics(ohmy I'm a bit otaku),cherry blossom,ramen,their street style,tea ceremony(wow),the culture is awesome there and bla bla bla. Japan let me go there !

France
Paris, Je t'aime! Un jour, je vais y aller avec quelqu'un que j'aime, il sera si romantique LOL. So, the most place you wanna visit in France? Louvre ! #drooling

Switzerland
Since I was in elementary school, I've fallen in love with Switzerland. Neutral state. There are plenty of reasons why I heart this country, too much too tell.

Lapland
Where is Lapland? Finland ! It's all about Kay and Gerda. One of my favorite tales, Snow Queen. A w e s o m e

The Neuschwanstein castle
hey, do you know where is it? I guess not. It's placed in Germany,near the border with Austria, south of Munich. Beautiful, isn't it? looks like a castle in Disney's cartoon. Yea! I'm Rapunzel *lol*

Venice, Italy

Last but not least, I wanna have a dinner in Venice. Pasta and a cup of tea, let's get lost haha !

merry berry christmas

2010-12-25T06:54:00.000-08:00

- silly -

' Merry berry Christmas fellas ! '
Have a blessed christmas :)
Jesus bless us :)

picnic time

2010-12-22T18:00:00.000-08:00

-picnic ,created by paul-
Is there a better way to spend a sunny summer day than having a spontaneous picnic?

What you need:

Bubble liquid and wands. Butterfly net. Bug jar. Drink boxes. Prepackaged cheese and crackers. picnic basket, cooler, beach bag or cardboard box. Large blanket or tablecloth for sitting on. Frisbee. Sandwich. Sand pails and shovel. And the most important thing are love,laugh,happiness.

Grab your very own basket to hold your goodies! When the mood strikes you are ready to throw in a few sandwiches, some cool drinks and you're off on your picnic!

hm,I wonder if I could go picnic on this holiday,I wish.

perfunctory

2010-12-22T06:46:00.000-08:00

Another random words and drawings. Actually, i made this sketch several weeks ago, that was an assignment from my teacher. He came suddenly and then asked us to draw/sketch on the paper and we had to collect it in one hour. I didn't have much time to think, so I just made something-i-don't-know. That was "gambar ngasal" made when I'm under pressure and in the blue mood. And I knew the result wasn't good, even worst , perfunctory haha.

the white gardenia : happy moms day

2010-12-21T12:28:00.000-08:00

Every year on my birthday, from the time I turned 12, one white gardenia was delivered anonymously to me at my house. There was never a card or note, and calls to the florist were in vain because the purchase was always made in cash. After a while, I stopped trying to discover the identity of the sender. I just delighted in the beauty and heady perfume of that one magical, perfect white flower nestled in folds of soft pink tissue paper. But I never stopped imagining who the sender might be. Some of my happiest momentswere spent in daydreams about someone wonderful and exciting, but too shy or eccentric to make known his or her identity. In my teen years, it was fun to speculate that the sender might be a boy I had a crush on, or even someone I didn't know who had noticed me. My mother often contributed to my speculations. She'd ask me if there was someone for whom I had done a special kindness, who might be showing appreciation anonymously. She reminded me of the times when I'd been riding my bike and our neighbor drove up with her car full of groceries and children. I always helped her unload the car and made sure the children didn't run into the road. Or maybe the mystery sender was the old man across the street. I often retrieved his mail during the winter, so he wouldn't have to venture down his icy steps. My mother did her best to foster my imagination about the gardenia. She wanted her children to be creative. She also wanted us to feel cherished and loved, not just by her, but by the world at large. When I was 17, a boy broke my heart. The night he called for the last time, I cried myself to sleep. When I awoke in the morning, there was a message scribbled on my mirror in red lipstick: "Heartily know, when half-gods go, the gods arrive." I thought about that quotation from Emerson for a long time, and I left it where my mother had written it until my heart healed. When I finally went for the glass cleaner, my mother knew that everything was all right again. But there were some hurts my mother couldn't heal. A month before my high school graduation, my father died suddenly of a heart attack. My feelings ranged from simple grief to abandonment, fear, distrust and overwhelming anger that my dad was missing some of the most important events in my life. I became completely uninterested in my upcoming graduation, the senior-class play and the prom events that I had worked on and looked forward to. I even considered staying home to attend college instead of going away as I had planned because it felt safer. My mother, in the midst of her own grief, wouldn't hear of me missing out on any of these things. The day before my father died, she and I had gone shopping for a prom dress and had found a spectacular one yards and yards of dotted Swiss in red, white and blue. Wearing it made me feel like Scarlett O'Hara. But it was the wrong size, and when my father died the next day, I forgot all about the dress. My mother didn't. The day before the prom, I found that dress waiting for me—in the right size. It was draped majestically over the living room sofa, presented to me artistically and lovingly. I may not have cared about having a new dress, but my mother did. She cared how we children felt about ourselves. She imbued us with a sense of the magic in the world, and she gave us the ability to see beauty even in the face of adversity. In truth, my mother wanted her children to see themselves much like the gardenia,lovely, strong, perfect, with an aura of magic and perhaps a bit of mystery. My mother died when I was 22, only 10 days after I was married. That was the year the gardenias stopped coming.

" Happy mothers day, mom. Moshiwake arimasen. Arigato. Aishi teru "

P.S : I read this story in Chicken Soup, wonderful :)

ggi !

2010-12-21T03:07:00.000-08:00

GO GREEN INDONESIA !
we should do the real thing to make it real , let's start from ourselves from the little things. We should(must) try it , you'll never know if you don't try :)

take to the sky

2010-12-21T02:24:00.000-08:00

" Open your eyes and soar above the blue. Take a breath and believe you can do anything. Time to spread your wings and take to the sky "

swt

2010-12-19T10:05:00.000-08:00

bonsoir :)

dunno why, tiba-tiba pengen posting(spamming) haha. And from my deepest heart I wanna say 'aku laper' hahaha. Serius, aku laper. Ngerjain buku dongeng 1001 sukses membuat perut saya kosong sekosong otak saya (ups). Dengan penuh harapan, aku iseng buka kulkas. "wow ada cake sisa kemaren, laper,makan enggak makan enggak". Mikir,hmmm,ini jam berapa ? lho uda lewat jam makan malam(yaiyalah uda subuh ini). Dengan tabah, kututup kembali benda bernama kulkas itu(ohmy!), lho tapi laper. Oala dasar manusia skeptis dan kucer *lol* . Pura-pura tidak lapar,pura-pura kenyang, I wanna say "Good night all, I'm starving and thank you for your attention". Ending-nya aku tetap laper dan tetap tidak mengantuk, fine! then let's watch the movie, hell-o the Kappa-man, nice to meet you ! :D
bonne nuit :)

funny little dream

2010-12-18T21:06:00.000-08:00

funny little dream, an indie pop duo from Jakarta, Indonesia.

A lovable song, cute(unyu),nice ! and this is wonderfully an awesome video clip, seems like one of my unyu dreams hahahaha(?). Don't you think that they look like a real happy couple,a sweet girl and charming boy(hey look! he's using glasses *lol*).

what i don't really understand

2010-12-17T04:09:00.000-08:00

My brother is totally extremely deadly obsessed with a thing named BALL ! he plays football , he plays basketball, he plays winning eleven, and he even plays my doll as a ball ._. And it bothers me and makes him be such a couch potato forgetting all of his home works. Hell-o what the hell is going on with the ball ! and fyi, I do hate boys who are addicted with the games! sometimes i just wanna burn and destroy those awful games rawwwr -.-

what they don't understand about them

2010-12-17T03:31:00.000-08:00

He has a guy brain, basically an analytical, problem-solving organ. It's not comfortable with nebulous concepts such as love, need and trust. If the guy brain has to form an opinion about another person, it prefers to base it on facts, such as his or her earned-run average.
Women have trouble accepting this. They are convinced that guys must spend a certain amount of time thinking about the relationship. How could a guy see another human being day after day, night after night, and not be thinking about the relationship? this is what women figure.
They are wrong. A guy in a relationship is like an ant standing on top of a truck tire. The ant is aware that something large is there, but he cannot even dimly comprehend what it is. And if the truck starts moving and the tire starts to roll, the ant will sense that something important is happening, but right up until he rolls around to the bottom and is squashed, the only thought in his tiny brain will be Huh?
Thus the tip for women to remember is never assume the guy understands that you and he have a relationship. You have to plant the idea in his brain by constantly making subtle references to it, such as : "hey,inasmuch as this plane is crashing and we have only a minute to live, I want you to know that we've had such a wonderful years together, which clearly constitutes a relationship."
Someday he might even start thinking about it on his own. He'll be talking with some other guys about women, and out of the blue he'll say, "hmm she and I, we have,ummm....we have,ahhh.....we.....we.....we have this thing" Huh? And he will sincerely mean it.

"Hmm I think so.Hmm really?"

role model

2010-12-17T03:06:00.000-08:00

"Hey do you know her?"

She is totally awesome. She is the little Maruko-chan. She is my role model.
cheerful,easy going,and funny Ohmy! I wish I were her best friend !

he

2010-12-12T02:25:00.000-08:00

He is my lil boy (playing the guitar)

-DHS-

g j

2010-12-10T04:03:00.000-08:00

- Bon Ami(haha gambarnya juga enggak kalah gj nya) -

hell-o ! someone begged me to be posted here(?), cause I'm a very-very-good-friend(haha) so,here it is zzz.. talking about my friends,

Manusia itu mudah galau. Aku punya teman. Temanku bernama Galuh. Galuh adalah manusia. Sehingga Galuh adalah manusia galau #galauanistasya

Manusia itu ingin eksis. Aku punya teman. Temanku bernama Yosua. Yosua adalah manusia. Sehingga Yosua ingin sekali eksis (!)

Manusia itu unik. Aku punya teman. Temanku bernama Alief. Alief adalah manusia. Sehingga Alief itu unik sekali #whytopoeneverdie

Manusia itu cerdas. Aku punya teman. Temanku bernama Nindy. Nindy adalah manusia. Sehingga Nindy itu cerdas :)

enough,I'm running out of idea. Hey, it's done guys ._.

P.S : sorry,this is so unclear|tidak jelas|geje , maklum aku kan #kucer(kurangcerdas) *lol*

words

2010-12-10T02:32:00.000-08:00

"The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone" - Harrie Stowe-

hb

2010-12-08T08:58:00.000-08:00

hell-o world ! hell-o 9/12/2010

Don't you know that today is my birthday blah blah blah . Hello sixteen goodbye fifteen !
hahaha HAPPY BIRTHDAY me ._. Nothing special , but I really thanked to Him because He give me another year,another chance and I hope it would be a better year for me. Sixteen, I'll graduate from senior high school, fk, make them proud (amen) . Ganbatte !

honestly, I'm so happy because I'm sixteen but I'm a lit bit unhappy because I'm no longer fifteen (?)

doodling

2010-12-06T02:55:00.000-08:00

(hey, i made this doodling randomly,fyi after i looked at it again hmm i didn't really know what was that *lol*)

i do love doodling , and it's so fun when you pour your feelings into a paper. You write, you draw, you tell your story. No one will complain. I would rather draw and write it than use my mouth , because mouth can't be believed.

"It's like you are sharing your story to your best friend who won't tell anybody about it"

100-5 = 9 5

2010-12-04T15:26:00.000-08:00

SRIGALA
'Seneng lan Rekasa ana InG Akselerasi smaLa Angkatan songo'

"Srigala ! seneng rekasa satus kurangi lima, srigala auuu !"
haha thanks, finally we have our yellyell (^o^)

Bersenang-senanglah ,karna hari ini yang kan kita
rindukan.Di hari nanti sebuah kisah klasik untuk
masa depan.Bersenang-senanglah,karna waktu ini
yang akan kita banggakan di hari tua #nowsinging

I've heard an issue that the acceleration class will be closed after the 10th generation, oh no please don't. Don't break our connection, I wanna attend "temu gen" or "buber gen" every year and meet my friends, please don't :((

leak

2010-12-04T01:57:00.000-08:00

There is a leak , there is a hole, there is a wound inside.

''Beware, a small leak will sink a great ship''

chambre

2010-11-27T08:29:00.000-08:00

one of the most favorite places in the worlf(for me) is my bedroom. Purple|Grey|White makes me so warm, not a big room but big enough for me. Messy but comfortable.
I can do so many things there,sleeping,eating,playing games,drawing,studying,reading,writing,being crazy,laughing, crying and thinking.

And do you think I'm wasting my time doing things I wanna do? But it hurts when you disapprove all along and now I try hard to make it. I just want to make you proud. I'm never gonna be good enough for you. I can't pretend that I'm alright #random

Those dreams have made me into someone new and it's true what they say
there is no better time than today. Good Bye to you and Me ,what a good friend you've been to me and I owe it all to you every good thing that I do is you #random

pauvre de moi haha

cooking games

2010-11-27T07:38:00.000-08:00

What were you doing during your lesson at school ? Playing gameeeess ! cooking games *lol* ^^

I was so bored and couldn't find what to do ,then one of my classmates suggested me to try some games, and one of them was cooking games. The first impression on my mind was "woow unyuuuu" hahaha*lol* . And then, I tried some games and found my self became addicted to those games(nonono). There were so many kind of foods and drinks, and really made me hungry*drooling* hahaha what a silly me , i just wanna made my self happy for a while because nowadays 'happy' seems to be so rarely. And these are the silly brilliant delicious foods :)

sushi - itadakimashu ^^
this is for my classmate, dessy, who love sushi and japan so much,yippie >.<

Tea Time Joy
haha this is for you-dont-know-who. bye.

Burger - Yummy !
This is for #srigala :))

Chocolate Cake
This is for my sisters and lil brother :*

sunflower

2010-11-15T07:15:00.000-08:00

Bonsoir,
Halo aku mimpi lho (so?) dan aku ingat mimpi apa (so?).Aku mimpi itu lagi, aku mimpi yang hampir sama, tokoh nya juga sama lho. Belakangan ini, aku mimpiin manusia-manusia itu, itu, lalala ^^ Itu yang sangat aku suka, tau siapa? itulah mereka..
Mereka adalah sekumpulan anak kecil yang berwajah seperti bunga matahari . Mengeluarkan sinar kebahagian (^o^), wajah-wajah yang masih sangat polos seperti yogurt rasa plain. Anak-anak kecil yang unyu(?) dan menyenangkan seperti es krim membuat hati senang semerah buah apel fuji. Aneh kan? tentu . Tapi setiap aku bangun dan inget mimpi itu rasanya senang sekali seperti sehabis naik komedi putar di taman bermain. Sepertinya aku merasakan masa-masa kecilku kembali(atau ini obsesi akibat masa kecil yang mungkin kurang bahagia).Setiap kali bangun dari mimpi itu, rasanya pengen ambil kertas sama pensil. Dan selagi masih ingat mimpi nya bakal kutulis hahahaha karena mimpi terlampau mudah untuk terlupakan(aneh tapi nyata) . Hahaha aku jadi suka lihat anak kecil ,dan aku punya anak idaman (?) yang pernah kulihat di sekolah minggu, anaknya siapa ya? keren sekali " adik adik, kakak nge-fans deh " >.< . Hahaha yasudah aku mau tidur dulu, semoga mimpi bertemu anak-anak bunga matahari lagi. Dimana ya? di kedai minum teh aja ya adik-adik, nanti kakak belikan lemon tea sama cheese cake deh (^o^) . Bonne nuit :)

" They are my sunflowers dancing under my blue blue sky "

lost

2010-11-15T06:24:00.000-08:00

" hello, I'm lost ! "
ok, let's call xxx
" bonjour, what can I do for you ? "
" Find me the way back home "
" so,where is your address ?"
" di hatimyuuu "
"......"
#stress

something nice to do

2010-11-15T05:58:00.000-08:00

nyam-nyaming while playing bubbles in the park

"do you wanna play with me? I'll give you my nyamnyam then"
"let's play ! And I want the oranged-flavored, yummy"

(something nice to do)

What I Like in A Guy

2010-11-15T04:42:00.000-08:00

1. brown hair | black hair | blonde hair | red hair

2. tall | short | same height as you

3. ear piercings | eyebrow piercings | snake bites | no piercings | other

4. tattoos | no tattoos

6. shy | outgoing | in between

7. mellow | hyper | loud | quiet

8. blue eyes | brown eyes | green eyes

9. wears tight jeans | wears normal jeans | other

10. converse | vans | nikes | skate shoes | other

12. compliments too much | compliments when necessary

13. jokes around all the time | jokes when necessary

14. sensitive | hides emotion | acts tough

16. loves to hold | loves to be held

17. tons of muscles | fit | skinny | chubby

18. pale | average | tan | dark

19. cusses a lot | never cusses | moderatly cusses | only cusses around friends | who even gives a fuck

F

2010-11-07T01:48:00.000-07:00

Oh My God ! It's November and then December will come. And then say welcome to 2011 WAW ! So? is that a good news? we are gonna have another new year party yey ! haha what the hell is that, I don't really care about that. The only one I care about is a word which is began with letter "F" . What is that? yea that's F-U-T-U-R-E
"heloo! look at your self , you're just 15 years old girl . Talking about that thing is still far away, isn't it? Just forget it and go playing with your friends !", roaring in my head. But now, I'm dead serious . I'm dealing with my future life, who I will be someday.
"So, what will you choose to continue your study ?"
"Of course, I'll go to university"
"What faculty do you wanna take?"
"hmm...medicine faculty perhaps hehe" *sigh*
Since I was child I've decided that someday I'll be a doctor just like my mom. Being a doctor is a perfect idea I guess. They are really helpful and so adorable with their white coat and stethoscope . But now it's different, I don't see with my pair of eyes anymore but using glasses, this's not ordinary glasses. It's made by the experiences and knowledges I've got since I was child until now. There are so many things I've seen in my life, in this world. And those make me re-think about my decision, re-think about old ambition. There are so many reasons that make me a little bit hesitate and down . Am I certainly obviously totally sure with that ? hmm though my little heart say 'yes' but sometimes my mind say 'no' .
"Do you have another choices ?"
"Actually, I have "
Graphic Design. For sure, I love art and everything which use our imagination . That's all make me happy :D But somehow after soul-searching about it , I think some people(guess who) don't agree with this option. Yeah I know what they're thinking about ! but I think they're too underestimated about this. Blaaaah whatsoever ._.

hmm but I still have another option and I've talked about it to my dad and he was so excited when I told him about my idea. I'm interested in environmental ,even though I don't really good at engineering but you never know if you never try.
Environmental Engineering , what do you think about this one?

How cool !

dizzy eyes dizzy heart

2010-10-30T09:02:00.000-07:00

I remember drawing this drawing at school,when the word 'busy' was still far away hmm ._.

have you ever felt so dumb like a donkey ?
have you ever felt so crazy like a zombie ?

Everybody seems invisible to me, I can't reach them and they don't notice me. SO WHAT !
This rush really make me going crazy. My head is too full and I can't think clearly anymore. My head is polluted. I'm too tired,exhausted,inside and outside. Inside? dont ask about it, I am totally sick. Outside? on progress to be totally sick.
Sometimes I'm afraid of being my self, I hate being an insomniac. This is really teribble . I've experienced for almost 4 days without any shuteye. No sleep. Just awake, but half of my soul had gone somewhere I don't know. I couldn't focus on something, I tried to study all night but the next day all of my memories had gone. During the exams, my head felt so heavy and I had a sudden headache *crying* When I looked at the exams paper I knew that I've solved those awful questions before but I just couldn't use my brain properly *crying*. Hence, I failed on my exams , it was the worst semesters exams I've ever done ! And I felt so sick deep inside my heart, I cried and laughed at my self, how could you be so dumb like a donkey ?
I want the old me, this is really really not me. This is my otherside, the gloomy one, the stressed one, the fool one ! The one I hate !

but I do love this sentence "cemungud eaa kakak ^^", it's like a burst for me. Although just a few of my friends who said that to me *sigh* so where are the others? they sink in the deep ocean! *gasp* . Thankies for all of you who give me a burst and who ignore me . I love you so much (^o^)

mad

2010-10-29T17:09:00.000-07:00

Ce que l'enfer qui se passe !

I'm gonna go insane ! you know what ? I hate this word so damn much --> failed
and I've failed on my examssssssssss because of something bullshit blah blah ._.

ups

2010-10-29T16:53:00.000-07:00

people may call me "alay" because I'm so "alay" that I made those doodlings about something"alay". Oh my gzzz!
._. ._. ._.

pauvre de moi

2010-10-29T14:59:00.000-07:00

A : Hey, regarde-moi.
B : oui. c'est quoi?
A : Ne sais-tu pas que je...
B : pardon?
A : je m'ennuyais. je suis fatigue comme ca
B : pardon?
A : uhh..(je ne t'aime plus)

"Should I walk away ?"

hamtaro

2010-10-09T04:07:00.000-07:00

taken by me, when I was in Bogor :)

they are so cute like marsmalooww , i want to eat them haha LOL

Do you know cartoon titled "Hamtaro" ? If you know it,let us sing its song together

Tuk ku tuk lewat lorong sempit

Tuk ku tuk Hamtaro berlari

Apa yang paling dia senangi
Biji bunga matahari

Yaa Hamtaro berlari
Tuk ku tuk Hamtaro berlari

Hamtaro berputar di atas roda putarnya

Apa yang paling dia senangi

Biji bunga matahari

Yaa Hamtaro senang berputar
Tuk ku tuk hamtaro tidur

Hamtaro tidur di mana saja

Apa yang paling dia senangi

Biji bunga matahari

Yaa Hamtaro tidur

LOL

bird

2010-10-08T20:21:00.000-07:00

taken at backyard

5 things about bird that I want !

#1 : free as a bird
Boredom. I'm bored and tired. I want to be free as a bird. Fly fly fly wherever I want. There's no need to worry because I have my wings, yes I wonder if I could live alone in another city or country(haha). Leaving my comfort area, my purple hut(I mean my bedroom), my home sweet home(sometimes home seems like hell fyi) , and go somewhere alone. Next year, I'll graduate from my school(amen) and I want to start my new life, better life. So, where's my next destination ? still dunno.

' dear my mom, hmm deep inside my heart, I really want to leave this city mom. I want to study in another city, be an independent girl. I'm not a litlle girl anymore, I want to live with my own way. You can trust me, I'm not crying because I'm so far away from home but I'm crying because I can't escape from home. So, let me go!'

#2 : new pet

Pet ? oh-my I want one ! when I was child I had a pet , a dog called Berry. She was beautiful and she had a child, a little puppy so I called her PAPI hahaha. But they were so naughty, they were liberalist and made my home so dirty with their f---s until my mom got angry. Finally, my mom decided to give it to her colleague. That day, I cried cried and cried like an evilchild haha(I'm the best screamer at home yey!). Blaah forget it ! Now,I want the new one! and I want a BIRD. I'll give it a wonderful name, Tea ! haha there's no special reason, just because I love tea haha LOL !

#3 : pencil case

this is so unimportant hahaha. I love animalsssspencilcasessss haha(?) I've had donkey, tiger, koala, rabbit, mouse, bear, dog pencil cases and I want the BIRD one ! :D

#4 : bird(t)hday

BIRD day? bird(t)hday ? birthday hahaha. December is coming :) 9.12 :) then, I'll be 16 years old. I dont want a party, sure ! but I want giftssssssssss and a gift from someone amazing (ok, don't dream too high)

#5 : transformation

do you know something about eagle ? I know something great about this BIRD. When eagle get older, they have two options : die or go through a painful process of change which lasts 150 days. Hmmm, what about you ,paul? of course, I want the second option, that's not easy. But you won't know if you dont try. Ganbatteeee!

There are so many things that I want, everyone has too, so open your eyes, fight it ,do the best that you can do ! Ganbatte everyone :)

fakerium

2010-10-08T19:54:00.000-07:00

That's an aquarium, but the fake one. Reminds me something, a memory in the past that I won't forget. The first day I met them. We were sitting together and thinking together, we tried to do the best for making something weird but useful. They were awesome with their opinions, ideas. Until we were confused to choose the right one, but not my idea 'fakerium' haha. But we made it from our idea, together as a team.

so let's call it "fakerium"

fake + aquarium = fakerium (isn't that cool?haha)

" Together, we can. No need to worry because we are solid "

chrysantherum

2010-10-07T09:54:00.000-07:00

Chrysantherum , oneday my sister brought a bouquet of flowers. It was white, pale white , and she said that she had brought it from the cemetery(that's real). And then I fell in love with that flowers in second , so she took some photos for me. What a lovely sister:)

Then, after I looked at the photos one by one , I realized that my face was as pale as the chrysantherum haha. My face had changed, perhaps. Some people suggested that I was sick but I wasn't. Hey, did i look like a zombie or maybe the coolest one,vampire, hah? haha some of my friends said it even my mother gzz. Hmm, maybe it's caused by depression ? when I couldn't bear it sometimes I acted like a zombie. No sleep. No meals. No smile. (advice:it's not healthy,dont try this) Nothing, yes I did nothing hahaha, then I'll laugh again. And one day, I'll do nothing again. Then, laugh again. What a life , sometimes you're in the top mountain and sometimes you're in the deep ocean :)

command

2010-10-07T08:27:00.000-07:00

notice me ! hmm, i must be so lonely that I have no one who notices me ? hmm I dont think so. I still have my friends, but i just cant breathe if I remember about one thing that I never understand. It's all about you. Don't you know that I'm here ? Please, notice me I'm here, exist. eat me ! haha I mean not to eat the books as foods,that's impossible and I'm still normal;love my usual meal gzz. Books ! yeah I love it so damn much. Don't you love it too? But sometimes, it also make me goin' crazy when I can't understand what the hell it's saying about (e.g physics books, chemistry books) oh NO ! Those books are awesome, they are my cup of tea oh-what-a-lie !
drink me ! hmm actually I dunno what to say about this. hmm, so "Let's drink a cup of tea with me! Anyone? " "ME" "really? oh my,I love you!" (whaat??)

shs

2010-10-01T09:00:00.000-07:00

senior high school

Sekolah menengah atas yang sebentar lagi akan berakhir (?) Dua tahun yang luar biasa menyenangkan dan mengerikan bersama ke-enambelas manusia lainnya.

" sepertinya baru kemarin kita bertemu dan sebentar lagi kita akan berpisah ? NO ! "

I do love my SRIGALA

(alif.nandya.dimas.handita.hasna.ivan.joseph.kevin.arif.faisal.paula.qonita.raras.ratih.steven.vani.dessy)

with love,

paul xi/axl 11

light my way

2010-09-27T09:31:00.000-07:00

In whispers and moans. When I was all messed up . And I had opera in my head . Your love was a light bulb. Hanging over my bed. Would you light my way ?
And so when I'm lost. And I'm tired and depressed. And when my mind goes astray. Won't you light my way. Help me find the bones of the dying dead.

P.S : I love you, Father :)

sibling

2010-09-26T10:22:00.000-07:00

Daniel Hotniari Samosir

Daniel our beloved brother, couch potato, tukang ngaret dan obsesi mempunyai badan tinggi(kasian dari dulu tetep aja imut kayak anak sd lol)

Grace Juillet Samosir

kak grass (rumput?), manusia yang paling memiliki selera yang sama seperti saya. Banyak yang bilang bermuka childish dan banyak yang bilang kalau saya kakanya grace(muka tua dong T.T)Manusia eksis.

Sunny Mariana Samosir
Kak suni, kakak tertua. Cerewet(sudah biasa), dokter muda, dan sebentar lagi akan menikah,amin (ga kerasa,padahal dulu dialah lawan gulat semasa kecil huhu)

I LOVE THEM, my-cup-of-tea

random

2010-09-25T17:08:00.000-07:00

We’re walking on a different tracks. Heading to a different space and time. And i can see you’re doing okay.Capturing your moves. Deliver love you might not received, not received.Let me come into the darkness of ur soul. Let me cure all the pain left from the past. Give me courage just to save ur wounded heart. Give it to me so i can touch the deepest side of ur lonely heart.Shut up and please shut down .Just pretend nothing happened. You don’t know me that well Don’t you judge me that way.I confess i don’t love u no more but i lie.